1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it'* illegal to kill them
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.
10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!
17. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
18 Procrastinate Now!
19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26. Ham and eggs... A day'* work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27. The trouble with life is there'* no background music.
28. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
29. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

Love 22

X2

lol

Good One.....

#13 describes our little corner of PA. Family tress here tend to branch inward.

i have shirts for #'* 2, 3 ,6 and 10 boy that makes me an idiot

<---- Geek.... diggin 28 lol

All were funny tho

Number 19. Isn't that the sad truth.

This is why I never finished my degree. Teachers don't make enough for 8 years of schooling, and no one reads books anymore so writing was out. Never saw a job opening for starving artist.

Not really sure that several courses of Spanish should be required for an English degree.

bah! \end rant/

Heh...don't get me started on that subject! I was lucky, I just dodged the 2 year foreign language requirement by 6 months when I went back for my degree.