Some of these ya may have seen,some maybe not.........

Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little bastard.
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Mary had a little lamb,
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
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SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
"What have you got there?"
Said the Pie man unto Simon,
"Pies, you dumb #$%!"
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HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
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GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
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There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad........

She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.

thanks for the laugh!! I needed it today