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Reuters gone mad! Passports ablaze! Quotes gone wrong!

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Old 03-24-2008, 06:25 AM
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Default Reuters gone mad! Passports ablaze! Quotes gone wrong!

http://news.yahoo.com/*/nm/20080321/...politics_dc_11

I'm surprised that after the following quote, the rest of the article wasn't just "BUAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
"I told him that I was sorry and I told him that I myself would be very disturbed if I learned that somebody had looked into my passport file and therefore, I will stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it," Rice told reporters.
What a horrible quote. I am so bothered by this. How dare they let people get away with such trash?

Let'* apply this quote to some other situations.

John was shanked by Bob with a rusty blade. Bob'* distant cousin, Martha, talked to John and then told reporters::
"I told him that I was sorry and I told him that I myself would be very disturbed if I learned that somebody had shanked me and therefore, I will stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it," Martha told reporters.
John was putting together a new shelving unit when Bob came by and slapped him with a rubber chicken. Bob'* distant cousin, Martha, talked to John and then told reporters:
"I told him that I was sorry and I told him that I myself would be very disturbed if I learned that somebody had slapped me with a rubber chicken and therefore, I will stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it," Martha told reporters.
Wow, I could go on all day!

As John was practicing the flute, Bob poured sugar into John'* lawnmower gas tank and then passed gas. Bob'* distant cousin, Martha, talked to John and then told reporters:
"I told him that I was sorry and I told him that I myself would be very disturbed if I learned that somebody had poured sugar into my gas tank and farted and therefore, I will stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it," Rice told reporters.
Here'* the best part about this story:
State Department spokesman Sean McCormack told reporters that Rice "had expressed the same sentiment" to Clinton and would when she speaks with McCain.
This is hilarious! "Hillary, I am sorry, and I myself would be very disturbed if I learned that somebody had looked into my passport file and therefore, I will stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it."

Why do I think this is so funny? I wasn't having much of a nice Monday morning, but then I came across this. Wow.
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Old 03-24-2008, 07:57 AM
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Lmao thats hilarious

As John was practicing the flute, Bob poured sugar into John'* lawnmower gas tank and then passed gas. Bob'* distant cousin, Martha, talked to John and then told reporters:
Quote:
"I told him that I was sorry and I told him that I myself would be very disturbed if I learned that somebody had poured sugar into my gas tank and farted and therefore, I will stay on top of it and get to the bottom of it," Rice told reporters.

Thats the best one, had me laughing for a while
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Old 03-24-2008, 08:05 AM
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Thanks! I was trying to come up with really weird ones, but man! I forgot to change that Rice to Martha in all the copy & paste madness. Ah, it'* fine. I like how since that one has two actions, it would take both sugar in the gas tank and flatulence to disturb Martha.

Also, good citizen, thanks for caring about the state department'* workers who snooped into passport files. Good thing at least one of them still has his job!
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