thanks for the input... to answer some question out there.. yes we like each other.. education is the first thing in line for both of us!!! hands down... i get on her azz when she wants to hang out and not study... we study every day for like 2 ro3 hrs before we have our alone itme...

marrage is nothing that im jumping into... and children are totaly outa the question for both of us... it was one of them topics in class a few months ago.. and we both agreed neither of us want kids.... so gettin her knocked up is not somthing that is gonna happen.. um i would never control a female or tell them to do something... nor would i ever try to preasure her into doin somehting that wasnt right... moraly or spirituly....

but either way the only prob realy is her parents... her mom is a lost casue... she just wants her daughter at home... hands down thats it... however her father is not totaly against it but at this moment he is not condoneing it either.. oh ya btw her dad was a officer in the military for YRS so its not like i wanta be on his bad side..

THe parents are gonna be tricky, espesciall if she'* living at home.
You certainly don't want to be on theri bad sie, but of course, she needs to lead her own life.
I would jsut continure on, but make sure just to always be respectful of her parents, no matter how much of a hard time they give you. In time, when they see you only have teh best intentions, they'll come around.
I know my wife would be ape going sh*t if it were her little girl, I think it'* a Mom thing. Let her Mom vent for now and in time she'll come around.

I personally think there is nothing wrong with it. It'* legal, that'* all that matters. If you love eachother, and both of you are happy, don't let what other people think interfere with it.

If she'* a good cook, everthing else becomes unimportant.

I'd say do like Wolfgang. Try and just sit down with the parents and find out what they are afraid of, and tell them your intentions. I think that alone (assuming they are normal understanding people) will go a long way toward putting them at ease since you said you don't have marriage intentions. At that point anyone that has an ability to judge character will see you have good intentions, and can actually be a good influence on their daughter with regards to getting her degree.

Ill say what hasnt been said yet. Her parents think that shes still the little girl that they both raised. When they found out how old you were, im sure the first thing that ran through their mind was their daughter getting laid with an older more mature hormone raging man. Heck, that would be my first thought if I had an 18yo daughter.

What the parents dont realize is by putting these restrictions on her,it ultimately will strain the parent child relationship in a way that no parents really understand. This leads to closure in communication, rebelius activity, and sneaking around.

Im sure you two will still see eachother and it will feel "sneaky" until you win the approval of her parents. (If ever)

As mentioned before, You need to sit her parents down and have a talk with the both of them. Make sure their daughter is present and express to them what your intentions are as a couple. The main thing to do right now is to set their mind at ease and let them know that their daughter is in secure company and that your not going to be dragging her to drunken parties or get her into doing drugs and or alchohol. Ask he rparents what their fears are.

When your a parent, and something like this happens, your childs entire life flashes before your eyes and you end up thinking the worst. Take that image out of their minds and set them at ease. Thats the best that you can do at the moment.

Well sir, what age are you about? Please don't say 30 something.

Anyways, my wife is about 4.5 years older than me.

As long as the younger person is 18 or over there should not be any real problems.

18 and 26 is not biggie. The older you two get, the less significat your age difference will be.

I guess I'm too old fashioned, but I do not agree with premarital sex. It is a biblical standard for very good reason. All the cons outweigh the pros on that one. That'* why I said dating with marriage in view, and ideally, dating with no sexual contact. But, sadly, this wicked world is spiralling out of moral control. If you really want a good relationship, and a good marriage, keep sex out of it until your honeymoon. You won't believe how great it feels on that night.

Just my 2 cents...most will disagree.

I could not agree more!!!

It IS a NY thing. In NY parents are respnsible for their kids until they are 21. Even if they move out at 18 they can get you for child supoort, etc. This includes step-kids. This I know as FACT; been there twice.

In the example previously given; good ole step-dad is sure lucky the girl was drunk.



As for the age difference thing; there'* nothing the parents can do to stop you right (laws being different in differnt states) ? Then why not have a talk with her parents, something along the lines of ;Look, we don't need your permission but we're just dating and I'm not the type of guy that wants to go around/sneak behind your back. I'm not out to steal your little girl, in fact I encourage her to stay focused; thats what we like about each other: school comes first, neither of us are remotely interested in drinking or smoking..." Perhaps a talk like that would put some needed points in your favor and put them a little more at ease with the situation.

Personally I was perturbed when My daughter came home with her older boyfriend. Now that I think about it, it'd be wise for her father to go along with it: I know my daughter didn't keep any of the ones I liked around very long...LOL