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Old 04-27-2007, 07:59 AM   #1
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Default Funny Joke Friday?

Husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks
over at him and asks the question:

WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?

HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"

WIFE: "Why not? Don't you like being married?"

HUSBAND: "Of course I do."

WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Okay, okay, I'd get married again."

WIFE: "You would?" (with a hurt look)

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan)

WIFE: "Would you live in our house?"

HUSBAND: "Sure, it'* a great house."

WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"

HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"

WIFE: "Would you let her drive my car?"

HUSBAND: "Probably, it is almost new."

WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"

HUSBAND:"That would seem like the proper thing to do"

WIFE: "Would you give her my jewelry?"

HUSBAND : "No, I'm sure she'd want her own."

WIFE: "Would you take her golfing with you?"

HUSBAND: "Yes, those are always good times."

WIFE: "Would she use my clubs?

HUSBAND: "No, she'* left-handed."

WIFE: -- (silence)

HUSBAND: "****."
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Old 04-27-2007, 08:16 AM   #2
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Good one bud...

But a reposty
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Old 04-27-2007, 08:54 AM   #3
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Never seen that one. Pretty good.
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Old 04-27-2007, 09:46 AM   #4
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First for me too!! Ahem Bill, do you think you could have at least waited a few posts to say that? lol

hehehe....
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Old 04-27-2007, 10:14 AM   #5
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That'* a good one!!

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Old 04-27-2007, 10:38 AM   #6
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That Was Funny. I didnt see the original post MOS and emailed to my Wife.
What I thought was also funny was what the Google Ad generator put below the post.......Look Down. I made a screen shot of it.

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Old 04-27-2007, 10:59 AM   #7
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The Flight Crew

The airliner pushed back from the gate, the flight attendant gave the
passengers the usual information regarding seat belts, etc .

Finally, she said, "Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain,Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to your destination."

Ed sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, "Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?"

When the attendants came by with the drink cart, he said "Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?"

"Yes," said the attendant, "In fact, this entire crew is female."

"My God," said Ed, "I'd better have two Scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think with only women up there in the cockpit."

"That'* another thing sir," said the attendant, "We no longer call it The **** Pit."


"It'* The Box Office."
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Old 04-27-2007, 11:04 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BLACK94SSEi
First for me too!! Ahem Bill, do you think you could have at least waited a few posts to say that? lol

hehehe....
As a lizard..you should recognize repost jokes..... (Put the crack pipe down...lol)
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Old 04-27-2007, 11:36 AM   #9
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lol I go through each thread just as you do buddy!! It so happens that the lounge is the first one up on the top
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Old 04-27-2007, 02:00 PM   #10
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Dear Abby,

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont , Texas who has recently been diagnosed as a
carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth
One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a transvestite.

My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling
marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are
prostitutes in Dallas .

I have two brothers: one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at
Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is
currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three
children.

I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in
Longview . She is a part time "working girl".

All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiancÚ and look forward
to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and
honest with her.

Should I tell her about my cousin who supports Hillary Clinton for President?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation
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