You're An EXTREME Redneck When - GM Forum - Buick, Cadillac, Chev, Olds, GMC & Pontiac chat


Lounge For casual talk about things unrelated to General Motors. In other words, off-topic stuff. And anything else that does not fit Section Description.

Reply
 
 
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 03-12-2006, 06:19 PM   #1
Senior Member
True Car Nut
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Purgatory
Posts: 6,313
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
PontiacDad is on a distinguished road
Default You're An EXTREME Redneck When

1. You let your 14 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table in
front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on
how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a
different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys,
watch this."

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife'* hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled Banner" are
"Gentlemen, start your engines."

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right
off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your
spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at
the House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there'* a law
against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.


Bonus

An East Texas couple, both bonified rednecks, had 9 children. They
went to the doctor to see about getting the husband "fixed". The
doctor asked them why, after nine children would they choose to do
this.

The husband replied that they had read in a recent article that one
out of every ten children being born in North America was Mexican,
and they didn't want a Mexican Baby because neither of them could
speak Spanish.
PontiacDad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2006, 06:25 PM   #2
Senior Member
Certified GM nut
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Home Sweet Home in New York
Posts: 2,009
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mortehl is on a distinguished road
Default

Haha!!


I've read that one before, but its still darned funny! Good one Pdad!
Mortehl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2006, 06:35 PM   #3
Administratus Emeritus
Certified Car Nut
 
GXP Venom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Purgatory, Pennsylvania
Posts: 16,538
Thanked 7 Times in 4 Posts
GXP Venom is on a distinguished road
Default Re: You're An EXTREME Redneck When

Quote:
Originally Posted by PontiacDad

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on
how much gas is in it.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys,
watch this."
Ok I'm quilty of two redneck offences. Never died......but been hurt alot after saying #6

Two catagories I can never get enuff jokes of, ...rednecks and blondes.........Hope the pontiac lady aint around............ back to the RACE!
GXP Venom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2006, 07:54 PM   #4
Senior Member
Posts like a Camaro
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Northeast MS
Posts: 1,079
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
94SSEgold is on a distinguished road
Default Re: You're An EXTREME Redneck When

Quote:
Originally Posted by gxp rules
Quote:
Originally Posted by PontiacDad

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on
how much gas is in it.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys,
watch this."
Ok I'm quilty of two redneck offences. Never died......but been hurt alot after saying #6

Two catagories I can never get enuff jokes of, ...rednecks and blondes.........Hope the pontiac lady aint around............ back to the RACE!
HEHE FYI, thats PDads wife

He'* the redneck, she is the blonde J/K PMom and Dad, y'all know that already though
94SSEgold is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2006, 07:58 PM   #5
Senior Member
Posts like a Camaro
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Northeast MS
Posts: 1,079
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
94SSEgold is on a distinguished road
Default Re: You're An EXTREME Redneck When

Quote:
Originally Posted by PontiacDad
3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
That right there would qualify moms ex husband for an all star award or something like that!! Yall veterens know who i am talking about!!
94SSEgold is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2006, 08:04 PM   #6
Senior Member
True Car Nut
 
Jack's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,105
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Jack is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys,
watch this."
I think I had an uncle whose last words were something like that
Jack is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2006, 08:36 PM   #7
Administratus Emeritus
Certified Car Nut
 
GXP Venom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Purgatory, Pennsylvania
Posts: 16,538
Thanked 7 Times in 4 Posts
GXP Venom is on a distinguished road
Default

i knew they were married, after I wrote blonde, I thought of a blonde post the didnt float well, but I left it....did I mention #6....I'm not all here, but most of the parts were found, This is about redneck jokes, more redneck jokes please. Please to meet ya P.Mom and Dad
GXP Venom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-13-2006, 08:35 AM   #8
Senior Member
Certified Car Nut
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Robbinsdale, MN
Posts: 15,408
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
MOS95B is on a distinguished road
Default Re: You're An EXTREME Redneck When

Quote:
Originally Posted by PontiacDad
6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys,
watch this."
This one is wrong. It'* actually "Somebody hold my beer for a second...."



I've seen this list several times, but it'* always good for a giggle!
MOS95B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-13-2006, 11:34 AM   #9
Senior Member
True Car Nut
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Climax Springs, Missouri
Posts: 2,493
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
LittleHoov is on a distinguished road
Default

I think another might be:

If the Tornado sirens are going off and you're outside with an open beverage saying "Where is that sumbitch?!" instead of taking shelter.

that one was very relevant last night, I myself acted out that very role
LittleHoov is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-13-2006, 10:15 PM   #10
Senior Member
True Car Nut
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Elberton, GA
Posts: 5,242
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
ga93sle is on a distinguished road
Default Re: You're An EXTREME Redneck When

Quote:
Originally Posted by PontiacDad
8. Your wife'* hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled Banner" are
"Gentlemen, start your engines."

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
It was a low ceiling, It'* not?, we have a fridge in the laundry room.
ga93sle is offline   Reply With Quote
 
 
Reply

Related Topics
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
You Know You're a Redneck If...... Purplehazeir Lounge 7 12-03-2009 11:41 PM
You might be a redneck if you drive.... LittleHoov Lounge 8 12-04-2006 10:37 PM
Are you an EXTREME Redneck? MOS95B Lounge 1 10-21-2005 01:06 PM
For you guys that need EXTREME JUICE GAMEOVER Audio (and aftermarket electronics) 0 10-12-2005 06:11 AM
How much of a Redneck are you? GonneVille Lounge 11 06-18-2004 07:46 PM


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:12 PM.


We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.