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Old 02-26-2004, 11:47 AM   #1
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Default SENIOR MOMENTS

An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car had been broken into. She was hysterical as she explained her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried.
The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way." A few minutes later, the officer radioed in. "Disregard," he says. "She got in the back seat by mistake.

Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day.
One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?"
"No," the second man replied, "it'* Thursday."
And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let'* have a beer."

A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home.
As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say "Supersex."
She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex."
He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, "I'll take the soup."

An older couple was lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk. She said "You used to hold my hand when we were courting." Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments later she said: "Then you used to kiss me." Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.
Thirty seconds later she said: "Then you used to bite my neck."
Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed. "Where are you going?"
she asked. "To get my teeth!"


As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife'* voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there'* a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!"
"Hell," said Herman, "it'* not just one car. It'* hundreds of them!"
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Old 02-26-2004, 11:58 AM   #2
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Old 02-26-2004, 12:02 PM   #3
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To get my teeth
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Old 02-26-2004, 12:14 PM   #4
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Default Re: SENIOR MOMENTS

Quote:
Originally Posted by SSE14U24ME
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day.
One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?"
"No," the second man replied, "it'* Thursday."
And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let'* have a beer."
That was Me, Will, and JustinD
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