On a hot summer day, a redneck came into Oakland, MD with his dog. He tied the dog under the shade of a tree and went into the Elks for a cold beer.
About 20 minutes later a policeman came into the bar and asked who owned the dog tied under the tree. The redneck said that it was his.
The policeman said, "Your dog seems to be in heat."
The redneck replies, "No way dog'* in heat she'* cool cause I got 'er tied unner the shade tree."
The policeman says, "No! You don't understand your dog needs to be bred..
"No way," the redneck says, "dog don't need bread, she ain't hongry, cause I fed 'ER beef jerky this mornin'."
Now the policeman gets mad and yells out; "NO! You don't seem to understand, your dog wants to have sex!"
The redneck looks at him with a long pause and says, "Go 'head. I always wanted a police dog!"