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Old 11-17-2006, 11:28 AM   #1

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Default My Repost of the Day

IDIOTS OF 2006 (as taken from email)


I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control

center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little

daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful

and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital.

She calmed down and at the end of the conversation, happened to mention that

she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants.

I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.

Here'* your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.

************************************************** ********************


Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a

life raft from one of the 747'*. They were successful in getting it out of the

plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they

noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them. It turned out that

the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated

when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing.

Here'* your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint might run.

************************************************** ****************************


A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America , walked into the branch

and wrote, "this iz a stikkup. Put all yur muny in this bag." While standing

in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone

had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the

teller'* window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to

the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note

to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors,

that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not

accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit

slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go

back to Bank of America . Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK"

and left. He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back

at Bank of America .

Don't bother with this guy'* sign. He probably couldn't read it anyway.

************************************************** ******


A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured

his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail,

a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police

department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from

the police that contained another picture, this time, of handcuffs. He

immediately mailed in his $40.

Smartbutt. But you still get a sign.

************************************************** ***************


A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the

cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber

saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told

the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said,

"Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk

still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him. At this point, the

robber took his driver'* license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The

clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put

the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The

cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber

that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.

This guy definitely needs a sign.

************************************************** *********


A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers.

The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled

first bandit shot him.

This guy doesn't even deserve a sign.

************************************************** **********************


Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that

he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze,

and run. So, he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the

window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him unconscious. It seems

the liquor store window was made of plexi-glass. The whole event was caught

on videotape. Yep, here'* your sign.
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Old 11-17-2006, 12:10 PM   #2
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Those were great!!!! ROFLMAO Especially the life raft one. We have a member here who works for that company
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Old 11-17-2006, 12:14 PM   #3
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I don't know if these are a repost here, but I've seen those exact ones from previous years.

Still freakin' funny though....I know I LMAO...thanks...
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Old 11-17-2006, 01:15 PM   #4
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I would have loved to have seen the video tape of the guy getting hit with the cinder block
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