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Old 09-25-2006, 04:34 PM   #1
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Default The Fairer Sex...

I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, Nancy and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT?? What was that?"

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear.. "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That'* fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let'* go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled----WHAT?"

I then said "Honey, I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial means as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,

"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:36 PM   #2
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:40 PM   #3
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Ya know,there was someone else here that had pretty much that same experience. Just not with your wife
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:42 PM   #4
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Oh.....repost??
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:43 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lash
Oh.....repost??
Duh!!
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:44 PM   #6
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I have seen this before, but every time I read it, I laugh
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:46 PM   #7
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BTW Repost King...

You're wife'* name is Liz..not Nancy.

Wait til I talk to Liz later on.
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:48 PM   #8
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Well, I just want to know who stole my real-life events and posted them here for everyone else to see. That'* so wrong, you know?

I'll get to the bottom of this....
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:48 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lash
Well, I just want to know who stole my real-life events and posted them here for everyone else to see. That'* so wrong, you know?

I'll get to the bottom of this....
Will that be while you are standing in the gutter saying "Nancy"?
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Old 09-25-2006, 04:49 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BillBoost37
BTW Repost King...

You're wife'* name is Liz..not Nancy.

Wait til I talk to Liz later on.
You better be the one to answer the phone

Quote:
Originally Posted by SSE14U24ME
Quote:
Originally Posted by lash
Oh.....repost??
Duh!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by lash
Oh.....repost??
Emotional needs
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