A father passing by his son'* bedroom was astonished to see the bed
was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope
propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, "Dad". With
the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling
hands:

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you.
I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice, even with all
her piercings, tattoos, and her tight motorcycle clothes. But it'* not
only the passion dad, she'* pregnant and Joan said that we will be very happy. Even
though you wouldn't care for her as she is so much older than me, she already
owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood big enough for the
whole winter.
She wants to have many more children with me, and that'* now one of my
dreams too. Joan taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and
we'll be growing it for us and trading it with her friends for all the cocaine
and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for
AIDS so Joan can get better. She sure deserves it!! Don't worry Dad, I'm 16
years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be
back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your son,
John

PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor'* house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my
report card that'* in my center desk drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for
me to come home.

A father'* worst nightmare!!! Very cute.

Damn, thats a good idea. Why couldn't I ever come up with something like that?

Shawn

I saw that on college humor and used a modified version myself. The old man thought it was pretty funny.