A mother passing by her daughter'* bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, "Mom." With the worst premonition, she opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Mom: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I've been finding real passion with Ahmed and he is so nice-even with all his piercings, tattoos, beard, and his motorcycle clothes. But it'* not only the passion Mom, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy. He already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. He wants to have many more children with me and that'* now one of my dreams too. Ahmed taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Ahmed can get better; he sure deserves it!! Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grand children.

Your daughter, Judith

PS: Mom, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor'* house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that'* in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

Thats awesome!!!!!! Im gonna try that sometime... with a few tweaks obviously. made me smile

that'* priceless

Hahahaha!! I needed a good laugh today!!

hahahahaha

Something tells me the daughter is still gonna get a good lecture when she gets home

That'* down right mean, but oh so funny.

Sounds like a father who has a daughter.

Haha, this reminds me sooooooo much of a letter my brother typed up for my parents. He basically said that he was leaving to live in the woods with his crack wh*re girlfriend and were doing to be pot dealers for the rest of their lives, and that she, too, was pregnant. Then, later he wrote that none of that was true, he had just gone to school, and wanted to remind them that there are worse things in life than forgetting to put away the cooler after fishing. I am scowering the computer as we speak to try to find it.

Read a variant of this before. Still hilarious.

Also remember a reverse of this. Grandma'* on Vacation and her Adult kids break the News about her favorite cats death gently over a weeks time. It starts out, Well Mom, Fluffy'* stuck in a tree and won't come down.....