The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.

The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a short time and you are so horny you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.

The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.

The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say "screw you".

The 5th kind of sex is called: Courtroom Sex. This is when you cannot stand your wife/Hubby any more. She/He takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.

The 6th kind is called Religious Sex, which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night.

Don't forget the 7th kind of sex - Social Security Sex. You get a little each month. But not enough to live on!

4 and 5 were the only sex I was getting in the final days of my first marriage.

I got the better of #5 though

im likeing #4 right now....seems to sum it up

Good ones, Tracy!!!

I like the first two

what happened to penguin sex

Do I even dare ask what that is??? I'm scared to know.

Thanks for the pm explaining it to me. I was right, I was scared to know!!!

works better as a visual