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Old 07-03-2009, 12:21 AM   #1
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Default 4th of July Stories

Anyone have any stories surrounding 4th of July and Fireworks to share?

I'll share this one....

Many years ago while I was still living at home, my parents had gone away on vacation and I had the house to myself. My parents house was on a lake and every year all the residents around the lake would try to one-up their neighbors with bigger, badder and nastier fireworks displays. This particular year I decided that I was the one that was going to try my best to impress the hell out of everyone.

I made a trip to a nearby Indian Reservation that dedicated a couple acres and over 200 fireworks stands to the discriminating firework buyer. I arrived and was overwhelmed that 200 stands could all make a living during the 4th, but soon found out they none lacked any business and they certainly tried their best to entice customers in with freebies, bigger shells and rockets. I made a few small purchases and tested the waters about getting some of the "god stuff". If you wanted the good stuff, M-80, M-500, Tennis Ball Bombs, Cherry Bombs, etc; you had to be discrete and not look like a cop and aska round. I found what I was looking for and walked away with a bag full of various illegal incendiary devices. Looking back, I should have probably transported them in a bomb blast proof vehicle and not the trunk of my 79 Camaro.

I made it home and looked over my booty - M-80'*, Cherry Bombs, couple of M-500 (1/2 stick of dynamite), Ping Pong Ball Bombs, and one Tennis Ball Bomb. The thing that intrigued me was the bigger the powder load and size of the device, the shorter the fuse. Laddy finger firecrackers had a 6" fuse, while an M-80 had less than 1".

4t of July came and the lake was ablaze with firework displays and the occasional explosion from those that made the trek to the reservation like I had. I lit off a few of the smaller devices I had throughout the night and at about midnight I decided it was time for the Tennis Ball.

I walked out to the end of my parents dock and set the Tennis Ball on piece of plywood. I brought the punk down to the fuse, hand shacking like I had palsy; and then truly realized now how efing short the fuse really was. As soon as the fuse let out a sputter and a spark, I turned heels and was running down the dock to the shore. I had nearly made it to the end of the dock when all the sudden it turned into instant daylight - I actually saw my shadow froze in a leap towards the shore. Then the concussion hit me in the back like I got slapped with a full sheet of plywood. I landed on shore on my stomach, rolled over and saw the biggest mushroom cloud I have ever seen in person rising towards the heavens from the dock. It was also at this time that I noted it was raining lumber...I had blown a good chunck of the end of my parents dock to bits.

I slowly got to my feet and could hear hoops and hollers from around the lake all in accolades to my small thermal nuclear device display.

The next day...hung over and sore; I was busy repairing my parents dock with new lumber. To this day I have never told my parents that I had blown up thier dock. Back then when my Dad notice new lumber on the dock and asked me what happened, I told him I found some dry rot and was bored, so made some repairs for him.

All right...let'* hear your stories.
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Old 07-03-2009, 12:40 AM   #2
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Heh, I think we've all been there. I busted my dad'* truck mirror, replaced it before I got home and no one ever knew.

This 4th I'm going to my best friend'* wedding, I'll let you know if anything interesting happened.
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Old 07-03-2009, 01:09 AM   #3
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...I lit my moms hair on fire....
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Old 07-03-2009, 03:33 AM   #4
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Default Exs Idiott Brothers Last Years Explosion

Ok I work at a local Chevy Dealer as most of you know, well 2 yrs ago i was at work doing a couple summertime oil changes in the back of the shop. I want to let you all know that my ex just so happened to live about 1/4 mile down the road behind the dealership. Her psychotic brother whose my age also lived there. Now mind you im underneath a car thats on a lift, half way thru draining the oil pan when all of a sudden the ground goes to shaking, the lift starts shaking and the car ABOVE ME starts trembling overhead... now i dive out from under the lift thinking for some ungodly reason OKLAHOMA is getting an EARTHQUAKE!!! then it hits me and i run to the back exit and look down the road towards her house... nothing

No smoke, no fires, nothing

I look around expecting some cloud of something and theres nothing to be seen anywhere. So I call the house, thinking her brother has got to be up to something. He answers the phone with this innocent voice like nothing happens but rolls when i asked why the shop just went to vibrating.

His excuse went as follows... They have recently outlawed Morning Glory sparklers in the southern states due to an abundance of people taking CASES of these sparklers and wrapping them in electrical tape so tightly and so thick that when lit it will literally break the foundation of your neighbors storm cellar when it ignites and blows up. He made one out of 3 cases, 12 boxes of 12 wooden magnesium sparklers, and 4 rolls of black electrical tape, wrapped from end to end with one protruding out as a sort of fuse... when it was thrown in the cellar and went off it cracked the concrete floor and 3 points up the walls... and shook the surrounding 6+ blocks of the city. I do not condone this as a play toy as I have also seen him launch a flowmaster 40 series 100 ft in the air with a smaller one... they pack a punch and would kill someone like a grenade if anything went wrong

but it makes for one hell of a bang.... i mean story lol

btw that was a very expensive set of damages he had to pay when the neighbors returned from their vacation, so remember accidents are expensive lol
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Old 07-03-2009, 03:46 AM   #5
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Default My Last Years Idiott Explosion

Ok after I was off work and got the toys together i was playing with Artillery shells and we were nearing the last of the boxes when we got some ideas for a better show... now normally you can if done right set one shell on top of another shell *stop smacking your foreheads guys* and light the fuse for the top first and then the bottom so they go off right after another... now you all have done it so dont say anything

Now me being me... I says to myself, Self... if 2 work so well... 3 will work better... *now feel free to smack your foreheads* First off it worked... the Triple Threat of Doom was GLORIOUS!!! from my point of view... the 3 were set right... (in a tube we only used 4, 5, maybe 10 times... bad idea #1) the fuses were tied together and set in with the perfect idea that the chain would result in them going off in the right sequence (Bad Idea #2) Then Bad Idea #3 came as I lit them with my zippo...

The first went up in a glorious display of red sparkles... went about 50 ft... the other 2.... well... the 1st one caused the tube to fall over... was too high in the tube and the launch caused enough movement in the tube for the other 2 shells to make it fall... it fell aiming directly at my family... the 2nd launched... toward my family... I SWEAR TO GOD ive never seen my grandparents move soo fast.... this while funny(only because nobody was hurt, it hit the grass and stopped short but was in 20ft of the chairs) was the explosion that broke the tube in halft leaving the third stuck in a broken tube and caused it to just blow up at my feet... green has never been so bright and purty i tell you what... but the initial blowing up only caused it to spin like a tornado and rise to an altitude of about 10 feet, just overhead, and then to explode in a deafening BOOM that shook my heart as purple blinded me for a second time

now when your only color options are green outlines with a purple center, and your family is yelling at you only slightly above the ringing in both ears due to 2 over powered, way to close, explosions... you've learned a lesson in firework safety... maybe just maybe the warnings on the back of the boxes were right lol

hope you enjoyed the stories, have fun, be safe, don't follow the monkey lol
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Old 07-03-2009, 09:12 AM   #6
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When I was younger, like 20s. We would get to the lake early to get as close as possible to the fireworks. We were right at the rope. We would lay back and watch everything go off right over us. The rope was very close. I watched the guy walk up with a flare to light the next set and it exploded right in his face. He flew back, the concussion was so great it nearly knocked the air out of our lungs. Everything went off right after that, dirt was flying, people were scrambling to get the guy out of there. The next year the rope was way further back and the fireworks were not lite by hand anymore.
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Old 07-03-2009, 10:15 AM   #7
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This memory may be a bit foggy, due to the fact that I was only 3 years old when this happened, but I've heard the story recanted by my parents many times since then too.

Back in 1983 my dad took the fam down to the 4th of Jul show on the Detroit River. He piled everyone in his 1962 Rambler he acquired from his grandparents. Beautiful car...
We got a decent spot for the show, not too close, my dad is cautious when it comes to family. I don't remember the show lasting very long at all before the crowd went completely apeshit as it appeared they were shooting the fireworks right at us. From the speed that people were scattering, we all knew that something had gone terribly wrong. We hustled back to the parking lot and my dad looked at the Rambler in horror. He always had this thing about knowing right away when someting was wrong with his car. Half of the letters that spelled Rambler on the back had been blown off. There was a huge dent in the roof of the car and the dome light was dangling by the electrical cord inside. I don't remember much else after that, only overhearing that someone was terribly injured in the whole fiasco. Years later, I found an old paper from the next morning that said a young girl had died when struck in the head by a stray mortar. Her baby sister was rendered deaf for life. Amazingly, I don't think anyone else was injured. Whoever set that show up in the first place had hell to pay, I'm sure. And blood on their hands for the rest of their life. Sorry for the sad story, but hopefully that'* a reminder: BE CAREFUL OUT THERE!

Happy Independence day, all!
-E
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Old 07-06-2009, 04:06 AM   #8
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Ok guys.. its not the 4th, havent been on this weekend due to my going to Tulsa for visits to my father. Now part of the reason i went was there is as always the 23rd St Bridge 4th O' July Freedom Festival there and they ALWAYS do a big show. Now this years was ALMOST halted by over budgetting the tulsa funds so they voted to have the taxpayers up the bill on utilities to cover the cost this year... lol funny part #1... The turn out was amazing... bikes galore, parking filled for miles around, the news cast afterwards lol said over 200,000 people was in attendance around the bridge to watch the show.

Now mind you they shut down traffic on the bridge and set up stage in the middle so IF anything goes wrong the shots hit the Arkansas River, instead of people like the previous tragedy stated. Now Amber (the lil lady) & I were fortunate to get to be on one of the fishing docks out in the river about 300 yds away from the bridge to view the show... that was our reason for dealing with all the traffic was a GOOD VIEW... and o did we get one.

Funny #2 occured when 5 mins into the SUPPOSE TO BE 27 min show was when 2 artillery shots fired into the air, the 3rd stayed on stage... it was a Glorious BOOM, lower BOOM, and on bridge BOOOM!!!! hehe this as im sure your picturing was awesome to see.. bad for fire works, a small flame, it was big enough to be slightly visible from where we were, could be seen on the corner of the stage but .. heck its tulsa... Keep Going!... they continued... *smack, this is a bad idea*

Funny #3, Shock & Awe... was about 8 mins later, 13 mins into the 27 mins show when the "Grand Finale" went off... as in the fire spread to the rest of the stage and 2 BIIIIIG ARTILLERY SHELLS made it up... the rest of what was suppose to last for 14 mins all went off at once... ON THE BRIDGE... IT WAS BEAUTIFUL... i was unfortunately struck in a shock and awe pose and neglected to act in time to get the good shot with my camera phone, got the last biig booom and a cloud of smoke and part of a bridge in the shot but its angled badly... will post later but it was stupendous lol

Fortunately they played it safe and it was all remote detonation so nobody was on the bridge to be hurt but the show was over quickly and "disappointed" alot of people... I thought it was well worth it... but hey im kinda demented that way lol
thought id share in my weekends delight, hope you all had a good safe weekend
-TL
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Old 07-06-2009, 12:20 PM   #9
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I know you guys in US have independence day, but here in Canada was 2 of my buddies b-days, so we had a great time at a club
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Old 07-08-2009, 06:29 PM   #10
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Okay so I do have something that happened this 4th.
My friend'* wedding was great and wonderful all day. Right until the end. A couple of my friend'* buddies decided to tp his car. Toilet paper, yellow "do not cross line", colored streamers and shaving cream or something on the windows with groom, bride, dog, and kid one on each 4 windows. Stuff that can easily be removed since that was they're get-away car. When he went out there he had a good laugh at it with us. His bride on the other hand.... I went back inside, later when she saw it and I didn't know she had I felt like a icy wave hit my as she walked by. I wondered what'* up when a friend whispered to me "boy is she pissed". I high-tailed it outta there even though I hadn't had a hand in it. All I could think of in my head as he she was storming off and he was following her was "and it begins" LOL
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