213 Things Skippy is NO LONGER Allowed to do in the Army.... - GM Forum - Buick, Cadillac, Chev, Olds, GMC & Pontiac chat


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Old 02-24-2008, 11:58 PM   #1
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Default 213 Things Skippy is NO LONGER Allowed to do in the Army....

http://skippyslist.com/list/


Number 58 had me crying.....
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Old 02-25-2008, 02:56 AM   #2
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Well Im still reading them as I type, and have had at least 10 belly laughs.

Im going to definetely have to work "in accordance with the prophesies" into more of my conversations hahaha!!
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Old 02-25-2008, 03:11 AM   #3
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oh my god i just got SO many ideas for next guard weekend
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Old 02-25-2008, 05:13 AM   #4
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Quote:
24. Must not tell any officer that I am smarter than they are, especially if it’* true.
There'* antecedent and pronoun disagreement. The correct version:
Must not tell any officer that I am smarter than he or she is, especially if this is true.

I also changed it'* to this is because I think the original implied that especially if one of them, an it, is true, Skippy must not tell it that he'* smarter.

And now for a random evil laugh picture to accompany the horror I have engaged with this grammatical correction.
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Old 02-25-2008, 01:02 PM   #5
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not original, that i can tell:
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7. Not allowed to add “In accordance with the prophesy” to the end of answers I give to a question an officer asks me.

36. Can’t have flashbacks to wars I was not in. (The Spanish-American War isn’t over).

46. I am not authorized to fire officers.

62. It is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission, no longer applies to Specialist Schwarz.

65. There are no evil clowns living under my bed.

147. I should not threaten suicide with pop rocks and Coke ®.

151. The proper way to report to my Commander is “Specialist Schwarz, reporting as ordered, Sir” not “You can’t prove a thing!”

blinker fluid and winter air
7, 36, 46, 151 ive done at work (except i dont have commanding officers, i have managers).






hilarious:
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54. “Napalm sticks to kids” is *not* a motivational phrase.

98. The proper response to a chemical weapon attack is not “Tell my chain of command what I really think about them, and then poke holes in their masks.”
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Old 02-25-2008, 02:35 PM   #6
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LMAO at these:
Quote:
124. Two drink limit does not mean first and last.

125. Two drink limit does not mean two kinds of drinks.

126. Two drink limit does not mean the drinks can be as large as I like.

145. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.

146. Nor should I drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same.
thats was funny...but now I didn't finish my Physics homework due in 20 minutes

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Old 02-25-2008, 05:31 PM   #7
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48 was a hoot as well.
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Old 02-25-2008, 06:04 PM   #8
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Quote:
91. I am not authorized to initiate Jihad.
105. I am not allowed to bum cigarettes off of anyone under twelve.
198. Not allowed to lead a “Coup” during training missions.
201. Must not valiantly push officers onto hand grenades to save the squad.
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