The title pretty much says it all. The car was sometimes hard to start before actually, but it would start. Now nothing at all. It cranks, but rarely fires, and when it does fire, it backfires out the intake as often as it fires correctly. If I didn't know better, I would think the wires were on the wrong spark plugs, but they are hooked up correctly according to this: http://repairguide.autozone.com/znet...5280217b35.jpg unless they are somehow labeled wrong on the coil pack.

It is definitely getting fuel and spark, it smells like gas out the exhaust and it sparks to ground. Plus it does fire occasionally, just rarely and sometimes not in the right direction. I'm pretty confident everything is hooked up right. I'm not really sure where to go from here.

I did a search around for all the key works and found a few suggestions, but nothing has gotten me anywhere so far.

I think you have the wrong diagram. I found this.

Sorry. Got the coil connections wrong. This is the same as yours.

Always connect these dis systems from point to point......'DO NOT USE THE NUMBERS ON THE COIL PACKS'.....The coils get moved during testing and usually will not be moved back to the original position on the ICM.
This is a different image showing the point to point connections.

Thank you all so much! That was it, I went by the numbers on the coil pack itself. 5 of the 6 cylinders were labeled wrong. Swapped them and it started right up!

Now I get to deal with the starter, because all this cranking from troubleshooting was apparently the final nail for a dying solenoid. The bendix hops out of the flex plate in half a crank, which isn't usually enough to start it. Grumble. At least that should be straightforward.