1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a
little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.

2. We also sleep in separate beds.
Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.

3. I take my wife everywhere.....
but she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our
anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"
she said.
So I suggested the kitchen.

5. We always hold hands.
If I let go, she shops.

6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric
bread maker.
She said "There are too many gadgets and no place
to sit down!" .. So I bought her an electric chair.

7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because
there was water in the carburetor.
I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."

8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
Then the mud fell off.

9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late
for the garbage?" .... The driver said "No, jump in!"

10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.

11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her
first name was Always.

12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
I don't like to interrupt her.

13. The last fight was my fault though.
! My wife asked "What'* on the TV?"
I said "Dust!"

Hilarious! So that'* life during marriage that I have to eventually look forward to?

Been nice knowing you PDad. You are so in for it now.

Dibs on the slicks. I can't use the rest :P

tsk! tsk! tsk! PMom is going to kick your arse And all the while you just keep digging deeper and deeper.

you can't even use the slicks...lol

the best guide to a good mariage is to not walk down the isle. you can live together forever, but that one day when you say i do, hmm no it all goes to h3ll in a handbag after that.

Boy, you are on a roll today. You are hating the world. Not all marraiges are made in heaven but there are those that are great. It, again, breaks down to making the right choices. I should know- I've made some rally bad ones BUT I've learned my lesson since then. If everyday was wine & roses people would get bored, but a good knock down drag out fight once in a while leads to hot make up nookie

Well, if you think of marriage as being stranded on an isle (short for island), then yeah, you'll have issues.

Walking down the aisle, however, ain't always too bad...

I'm batting .400 (one failed, one that I only want to strangle occasionally)

long as you haven't killed her yet.