Why Dogs are 10 X Better Than Cats!!!
 

Dog’s Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Cat’s Diary

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

hahahahaha that's funny. good one!

That's friggin hilarious!

It's also true.....I was a cat butler once...never again! :D

I own a cat as a pet, he doesn't own me.

That's the problem with most people, they don't train their cat. Meanwhile if it were a dog they have to because otherwise it's crapping all over the house. :thumbup2

Personally I've always felt the problems were with the owners. :)

So..you've called me an elder today ad now you're saying that my being a cat butler is my fault? Who pee'd in your Wheaties this morning and why am I being targeted as the one to receive your pimp-slaps? :D

I love dogs so much and cats are okay to visit. I was the bonnevilla the and the cat stared me down through the door as if to . "I'm getting outside no matter what you do"

Ask Bill about the "Cat from Hell" that I personally captured at the Bonnevilla and helped him into the vehicle used to remove him from the premises Kevin.

I love my cats and dogs, but see some of the clear differences shown in the joke.

Fuzzy wanted to go out and he knows it's not my job to be his butler. He goes when he can and hopes for an opening when his balls are freezing off. :eek:

Kev... I dunno man. I didn't realize you were a cat guy. All I ever saw was the post about the dog. Plus..you seem more like me, a guy who doesn't let a critter than can't walk on two feet rule their life.

There's the problem Bill...your cat still has balls! Take the balls off and the cat's wandering days are all but over! Kinda like getting married :D

Nice analogy Kevin. I'll have to remember that one.