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Shower differences between Women and Men..

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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:10 AM
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Default Shower differences between Women and Men..

How to Shower Like a Woman


1. Take off clothing and place it
in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
along; the way, cover up any exposed areas
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more
sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it'* clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16.Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


How To Shower Like a Man


1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your arse.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make f**t noises
(real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16.Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19.Throw wet towel on bed.
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:34 AM
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I could swear someone has posted this before.... If only I could remember who....

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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:35 AM
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Originally Posted by MOS95B
I could swear someone has posted this before.... If only I could remember who....

It had to be you. Leave it to you to share your showering habits with us :P
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:37 AM
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Originally Posted by SSE14U24ME
Originally Posted by MOS95B
I could swear someone has posted this before.... If only I could remember who....

It had to be you. Leave it to you to share your showering habits with us :P
I have an instructional video as well....
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:39 AM
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Originally Posted by MOS95B
Originally Posted by SSE14U24ME
Originally Posted by MOS95B
I could swear someone has posted this before.... If only I could remember who....

It had to be you. Leave it to you to share your showering habits with us :P
I have an instructional video as well....
LOL
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:41 AM
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Originally Posted by MOS95B
Originally Posted by SSE14U24ME
Originally Posted by MOS95B
I could swear someone has posted this before.... If only I could remember who....

It had to be you. Leave it to you to share your showering habits with us :P
I have an instructional video as well....
I do not wish to see you shake your wiener and say "woo woo" to the camera
:P
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:45 AM
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Hmmmm, I quess some things are to be viewed live.
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:46 AM
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Originally Posted by GXP Venom
Hmmmm, I quess some things are to be viewed live.
Fine, I'll let you go watch MOS shower and you can report back to us
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:50 AM
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Total showering times:

Woman - 1 hour and 15 minutes

Man - 10 minutes max.

Time needed for woman to clean up after man showers - 1 hour and 5 minutes
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Old Jul 27, 2006 | 10:55 AM
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What can I say, I'm a guy.
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