How many of these are so true............

10. I could use some pointers… show me how you used to spank her.

9. Do you mind if we borrow your video camera, for the evening?

8. I just got my license today… I can’t believe I made it over here alive!

7. Five bucks says she'* a D-cup.

6. Yeah, I can unscrew it and take it out, but then there’* a huge hole in my tongue.

5. Don’t worry… I’m only contagious when I have a break out.

4. Hi, I'm Robert, but my friends call me Back Door Bob.

3. I couldn’t help but notice your apartment number is 69… that’* my favorite number!

2. Did you know that Costco carries 60-gallon drums of vaseline? How handy is that?!

1. Hey, we’ve got something in common… she can call me daddy too!

LOL!

Now that'* just wrong! That right there is shotgun practice, my friend....

Is that for real? Do they really have a 60 gal of vaseline? I wonder what they use it for.

Orgies of course

The perfect way to dump the date you never wanted! Isn't that just useful? I love it!

You wanna dump a date? Try one of these lines (some for men, some for wimmens)

12 Things You Never Hear On A Date

1. Hey hottie! Who'* your fat friend?

2. Stop calling. You are fat and uninteresting.

3. I slept with your mom.

4. Of course you need more shoes, honey.

5. No baby, you're just big boned. Just kidding. You're fat.

6. Your sister is hot. I'm just saying. Seriously. I'd do her.

7. No baby, I love that time of the month.

8. I'm just here for food. I really couldn't care less about you.

9. No seriously. Put your bra back on. I just want to talk. Talk about what interests you.

10. If we are going to hang out, you are going to need to get a lot more attractive.

11. Small? Nah. I think it'* cute.

12. Your male pattern baldness is so sexy!