The South
#1
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The South
Tennessee
The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so
he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He
called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the
University of Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to give you
$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary
thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings."
You gotta love those UT women.
************************************************** *******************
Alabama :
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos
for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering
under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where'* Henry?" the others
asked.." Henry had a stroke of some kind. He'* a couple of miles
back up the trail," the successful hunter replied."You left Henry laying
out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired. " A tough call,"
nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
************************************************** *******************
Louisiana :
A senior at Louisiana was overheard saying... "When the end of the
world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana ." When asked why, he replied
he'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana
20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world.
************************************************** **************
Mississippi :
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said
to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the
parking lot!" Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man
answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."
************************************************** **************
Georgia :
A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
************************************************** **************
North Carolina
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the
road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car
and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby
studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around
and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man
replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what'* with the
flowers?" The man responded, "When you break down they tell you
to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I never did understand
it neither."
************************************************** ******
And My favorite:
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of
anyone retiring and moving North!
The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so
he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He
called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the
University of Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to give you
$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary
thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings."
You gotta love those UT women.
************************************************** *******************
Alabama :
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos
for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering
under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where'* Henry?" the others
asked.." Henry had a stroke of some kind. He'* a couple of miles
back up the trail," the successful hunter replied."You left Henry laying
out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired. " A tough call,"
nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
************************************************** *******************
Louisiana :
A senior at Louisiana was overheard saying... "When the end of the
world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana ." When asked why, he replied
he'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana
20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world.
************************************************** **************
Mississippi :
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said
to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the
parking lot!" Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man
answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."
************************************************** **************
Georgia :
A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
************************************************** **************
North Carolina
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the
road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car
and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby
studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around
and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man
replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what'* with the
flowers?" The man responded, "When you break down they tell you
to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I never did understand
it neither."
************************************************** ******
And My favorite:
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of
anyone retiring and moving North!
#2
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True Car Nut
Hahahahaha...very good!
I'd seen a couple of them, but my favorite of these today is probably the one from North Carolina. I can actually hear the guy saying "fla-eres", kinda with an added syllable.
I'd seen a couple of them, but my favorite of these today is probably the one from North Carolina. I can actually hear the guy saying "fla-eres", kinda with an added syllable.
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Georgia :
A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
Who told you about that? He said he wouldn't tell anyone.
A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
Who told you about that? He said he wouldn't tell anyone.
#4
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And My favorite:
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving North!
That'* why we go sooooo many people down here that don't know how to drive
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving North!
That'* why we go sooooo many people down here that don't know how to drive
#6
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Originally Posted by dbeast420
And My favorite:
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving North!
That'* why we go sooooo many people down here that don't know how to drive
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving North!
That'* why we go sooooo many people down here that don't know how to drive
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