Ok... my bonne has been great so far, until a couple of days ago... I had come to deal with my power door locks and power seats not working, and having my dummy lights on... until... the door locks started working, and the seats, and the dummy lights going out... all of a sudden I was driving a wicked car! Until....

This morning, as usual, I was going to go out, start the car, and scrape the windows... well... for the first time, she didn't start... she would crank and crank and crack, but no fire... I could get her to fire if I used the gas, but would die as soon as I let off the gas... and along with this.. the power seats and door locks aren't working again, and I had the SES light come back on... saying code 26 (QDM)...

All along, I've known that I have a short somewhere... I just don't know where to look... I don't know where to start, and on top of that.. what to look for.. I am very mechanically enclined.. but this just has be baffled... everything I've taken apart, has been fine.. and I'm at my wit'* end!

All I know is.. I need HELP!! Please!!

I'm sure there is someone out there that can lead me in the right direction... and ANY help would be appreciated!

This is a wild guess, have you checked all the grounds? Start at the battery terminal, under the coils, under the carpet @ driver'* left foot, etc.

See if this thread helps.

http://www.bonnevilleclub.com/forum/...ic.php?t=40656

I've checked all the grounds, connectors, and splices that they have in common.. all were good, clean, where I could, I took them apart and cleaned them with electronics cleaner, and coated them with dielectric grease... That includes the one shown in the linked thread.. The thing that confuses me the most.. why would my SES light, and ABS light both not come on anymore? I've checked the codes, and it does the proper code 12.. and nothing else.. I haven't checked the ABS codes yet, but I'm assuming the same thing will come up...

I have no burt fuses, I've replaced all my relays.. everything... my only option left is to do a complete tear-down, so I can get at all the electrical.. so I can go through it all wire by wire.. which isn't something that I want to do...

Did you install new battery cables and terminals? If they are the OE kind with sealed terminals, I've seen them corrode inside the insulation so it looked fine but didn't pass current well. It was strange how it would present the problem intermittently. Sometimes it would be okay, then ZAP! it would start freaking out like a roadie at a Grateful Dead concert.
About the lack of codes, when the battery is disconnected for a certain length of time the codes get wiped. You need to check for codes before you lose battery power.

you really ought to be thinking about a tear-down..you really have nothing to lose...it will probably let you see things you have never seen b4. Wires corroded, connections...relays...things like that...

tear er down..!!

you don't wanna be dealing with a bi-polar car...lol

The car ran perfect, with the codes and no power seats/locks for 4 months.. then the seats/locks worked, and 2 days later, all the SES and ABS codes dissapeared, on their own... I didn't disconnect the battery.. and I know that it wasn't a lack of power, since my radio didn't lose its presets, and the compass still works perfect...

I'm hoping to do a complete tear-down this weekend at my uncle'* house.. he has a nice garage.. and a few tools that I don't have... lol...

On the no start condition it sounds like you have a massive vacume leak if it tried to start when you press the gas.
Check the little nipple that connects the PCV valve to the intake. Its common to blow off on our cars. Put a small clamp on it. Then do a visual on the rest of the vacume connections.

I didn't check for the pcv valve.. and that makes sense... but as for teh rest of it, I don't hear a leak anywhere.. and I'm sure I don't have one... this car has me so confused its not even funny...

You will most likely not hear a vacuum leak, even a big one. You need to visually inspect all the vacuum lines, or better yet go ahead and replace them.
As far as I know, the only way to erase codes is to either disconnect the battery or disconnect the power to the computer. You say the radio kept the presets, which sounds like at some point, the computer lost power or got unhooked.
There'* always the option of taking it to a dealer or a reputable garage.