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Bar Games: A Review

Old 05-03-2006, 11:48 AM
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Default Bar Games: A Review

It may come as quite a shock to some readers (if so, those readers clearly aren't Bonneville Club Vets), but the membership here at Bonneville Club are huge supporters of bars. We visit them with regularity.

Like any relationship, sometimes you and your bar have to find a way to make things new and exciting again.

Enter the bar game.

Bar games are essential for keeping your relationship with your bar healthy. Bonneville Club would like to take a moment to discuss the merits and downsides of a few bar games.

Pool

A game of skill, strategy, and cunning, pool is a great way to meet new people. It is also a very good date game: you and your partner against everyone else. If you're a guy and your date is unfamiliar with pool, you have a valid reason to get in close and rub up against her whilst ostensibly showing her how to hold the stick and make a shot.

As a downside, about 75% of the bar fights I have seen have erupted over the ownership of the quarter that is up next or who "didn't call that shot".

Bar Crack

A colloquialism for the touch screen games often found at the corners of bars. As the name indicates, one play often leads to a lifetime of addiction. While you keep telling yourself you can score higher if you just play one more game, your wallet dwindles exponentially. Which directly affects how much booze you can purchase.

Darts

Thankfully, these days most joints use "soft tip" darts. Steel tip may be the superior choice from the standpoint of the dart aficionado, but having aerodynamic weapons and drunk people all in the same room...that is a recipe for bad.

Sex

Attempting to get laid is often a game in itself. Very much akin to roulette. You spin the wheel and hope for the best: you may get a nice girl, you may get a girl with a very angry boyfriend, or you may even get a disease ridden skank. You never really know.

Standing Games

This is a more general category including: videogames (PGA Golf, Golden Tee, Bowling, etc.) as well as pinball, foosball, and others. Most of these are wonderful, albeit at times expensive, diversions. For the record, PGA Golf kicks the **** out of Golden Tee.

All in all, the bar game in an integral part of the bar-going experience. It is a very fun way to keep things exciting and new for you and your bar.

Because it certainly isn't fun dealing with all the other asshats you'd get stuck talking to without games to occupy your time.

Bar Games: A+
Other Asshats: F
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