Men Are Happier People
03-04-2006, 01:44 AM
#1
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Men Are Happier People
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last
name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans
take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be president. You can never be pregnant. You can
wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO
shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal You never have to drive to
another gas station restroom because this one is just too
icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to
turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add
character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People
never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically
expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your
feet. One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know
stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one
suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra
credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be
your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of
shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap
problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in
your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original
color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually
hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of
shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts
no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails
with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice
concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on
December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans
take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be president. You can never be pregnant. You can
wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO
shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal You never have to drive to
another gas station restroom because this one is just too
icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to
turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add
character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People
never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically
expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your
feet. One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know
stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one
suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra
credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be
your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of
shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap
problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in
your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original
color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually
hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of
shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts
no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails
with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice
concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on
December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
03-04-2006, 02:47 PM
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Location: North of Buffalo, NY *** NEBF '05, '06, '07 *** ***ONBF & NYBF 06; 07*** ***WCBF 06***
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Had to laugh myself....i would be a happier person too if all I had to worry about was "What time is the game, match, or race on?" and "Do we need more beer?" Lol....
03-04-2006, 04:20 PM
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Oh thank god we men don't have to get tampons. However, we're unlucky too. If we try to hit on a woman, we can get slapped with a sexual harassment suit and our pockets will be empty faster than Mary Kate Olsen can chuck her dinner.
But I think we men lead a pretty good life.
But I think we men lead a pretty good life.
03-04-2006, 04:21 PM
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Originally Posted by fuelforthesoul1999
Oh thank god we men don't have to get tampons. However, we're unlucky too. If we try to hit on a woman, we can get slapped with a sexual harassment suit and our pockets will be empty faster than Mary Kate Olsen can chuck her dinner.
But I think we men lead a pretty good life.
But I think we men lead a pretty good life.
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