A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Little Johnny what is your problem?"
Little Johnny answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister
is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be
in the third-grade too!"
The teacher had enough. She took Little Johnny to the principal'*
office. While Little Johnny waited in the outer office, the teacher
explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told
the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer
any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
The teacher agreed. Little Johnny was brought in and the conditions were
explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Little Johnny: "9"
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Little Johnny: "36"
And so it went with every question the principal thought a
third-grade should know.
The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I
think Little Johnny can go to the third-grade."
The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"
The principal and Little Johnny both agree.
Teacher: "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Little Johnny: "Legs"
Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
(The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
Little Johnny: "Pockets"
Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Little Johnny: "Pants"
Teacher: What'* starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?"
(The principal'* eyes open really wide and before he could stop the
Little Johnny: "Coconut"
Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
Little Johnny: "Bubblegum"
Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and
dog do on three legs?" (The principal'* eyes open really wide and
before he could stop the answer...)
Little Johnny: "Shake hands"
Teacher: "Now I will ask some '"Who am I" sort of questions, okay?"
Little Johnny: "Yup"
Teacher: you blow me, you feel good"
Little Johnny: "Nose"
Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a
Little Johnny: "Arrow"
Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a
lot of excitement?"
Little Johnny: "Firetruck"
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put
his *** in the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself.
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