Well for the past few days I have had a nasty cold/flu sore throat fever stuffy face you know achy bones, headache yeah that. Well yesterday I came home to grab a nap and try
to feel better. Four hours later i wake up and I feel worse anyways.....


I headed over to my girls house Her son had it completely turned upside down a total mess TV on full blast typical B.*.. I'm sitting there wanting to grab this kid by the ear and either make him clean his mess or kick his azz right to his room I instead had a few choice stern words for him gave her a kiss and said I'll be back later.

I get in the car (this is where I do my best thinking) At this point everything is going through my head in kinda slow motion even traffic seems to be moving slowly. I drove for almost 2 hours thinking, thinking about whats going to happen when she moves in with me (yes I said SHE moves in with me not together or me with her) and I say that because thats the way I see it right now she isnt working she doesn't have a nest egg saved up she basically has me. I'm thinking how I'm going to feel coming home to a disaster because her son has no respect for her or anyone or anything. I don't know that I'm looking forward to Your not the boos of me I don;t have to listen to you go F yourself Ahole or what ever other choice words he has at that moment in time. Now don;t get me wrong he is improving but he has a long way to go a long way.

So I'm driving and driving at this point I don't even really know where I am even the old farmer in front of my doing 10-15 under the posted speed limit isn't bothering me. I'm thinking about what she means to me and how much I am in love with her and all of the obstacles we have been through and we are where we are today because we both understand what we mean to each other.

It'* not that I'm afraid of change, I'm just well I don't know.

I guess I'm just sick and when I'm sick I am not 100% and no I'm not backing out or even thinking about it just getting it off of my chest I guess. I understand what she has been through I saw where she was and I deal with it with her every time her Ex does something stupid like last week he Called her on Friday and said " My gas got shut off I can't pick up Shane" you would think that he would take him the next weekend right.... Nope. So today I told her not to answer the phone when he calls because monday were going to see my lawyer and she is going to take him back to court. Since she got this agreement 6 months ago he has followed through with it half a dozen times. I told her tonight as of right now were playing it my way, Were going to see my lawyer on Monday and start over.

Why is it I have to always stand up and where is my rock ? sometimes I just feel like I have to always have the answers who has answers for me?

anyways I'm not looking for sympathy like I said I'm just getting it off my chest. It would though be nice to have one day go by with out having to pick up someone else'* pieces .


thanks for caring...

on the bright side the evil cat from hell who hates everything from her own shadow to the drip in the sink is sleeping on my lap right now..

Wow, sounds harsh. Would it be possible for you to go somewhere and spend a day just kinda by yourself? I've never had that much sh*t goin, but that always helped me.

On the previous note. That sounds reasonable. I have jsut begain doing something like that I call it FLUSH time. Get everything out of my system and get some " fresh" air.

Are you feeling better since you got it off your chest?

sometimes a good drive with your thoughts help you, I done that before and I find it to be very relaxing...also mowing the lawn has that same effect for me, I agree with Chris you should get away for the weekend and be alone with your thoughts

Yeah but for me a day by myself usually consists of about 300 phone calls. Thats why 2 or 3 hours in the car kinda does the trick for me. I do have a lot of **** going on but then again what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Sometimes I wish the less important **** would just disappear for a little while. I have always been better when I am dealing with multiple things but everyone needs a vacation once and a while lol.

Been there; got the gray hair to prove it.
Good luck with that; I sincerely wish you the best.

It aint easy being a man

As for the boy well its not my place but all teen agers push their boundries, sit him down and define yours.

why you little.............
whyyoulittle.png


I'm kidding, I'm kidding


You can do it Rob, In time you can prove your a better Man than his real dad is

im not very old....<<18 but ive been through alot...i to find mowing the lawn good, i also have a 100lb punching bag that takes a good beating...and also a few hobbies, i race rc cars at my local shop and build the occaisional model car with my spare time it works pretty good for me

Pdad if he was a teenager it would be a simple solution Military school lol..

I am the kind of guy who sets that bar High and have raised my son to do the same, Sometimes i come down hard on him or from a person on the outside looking in they might see that Im more like Sargent and he is the private. But he hasn't let me down (yet) Like today I was tossing the football to him after 3 or 4 soft passes i told him to run then I passed the ball he didnt catch it but he did the next time. Her son has never had that a man to show and teach him and now 9 years later I don't really think he wants it. Not that I won't be there to show him and maybe he'll make that next turn around. Im not an easy person to sway I'm sort of what you call set in my ways I have a lot of fight in me but sometimes you just burn out thats life something inside you just says he Idiot take a break Rome wasn't built in a day.

Then today I take my son shopping he grabs one of them sponge swords (for the pool) and cracks me in the back of the knees, Did I get mad and give him he|| no I grabbed one and had it out with him chased him around and systematically tore him up. Then the evil walmart lady made us stop. I like to have fun and a good time. the funny thing is I can also be a A$$hole I go by the rule be nice to me and I'll give you what your need and let our earn what you want. **** on me and to bad for you. Her son has a problem with discipline not me and that I know.

Thanks again everyone even just typing it out helps ALOT.