Thats what she tell me. The same thing. I lost my job twice and its hard for me to support her.

That'* actually not what I meant But that too makes sense. You (everyone) have to feel confident, and happy with who you are before you can be happy with someone else.

Bro!!! you're 24...I'm 24...and single, its no worries, you're a young guy, so much to look forward too...you too young to get down on yourself.

Keep that chin up, max out the Bonneville and you'll be fine.

Still not easy, but you have lots of time

I got it.

I have once thought that before ( not to the extend of being married.. but engaged to someone I knew wouldn't work out.. but was too ignorant or in too much denial to admit it ). I too went on a roller coaster ride of feelings, and it seems like you can't stop thinkin of that person.. and the "What If" scenario of things you've done. Just remember that you have 9 years invested into her ( and picture yourself smoking for 9 years.. then all of a sudden went cold turkey ) it becomes a habit of having that someone around all the time. So you have to dig down inside and ask yourself a few questions.. is this the best for her or I? Is this what would make her or I happy? Am I truly in love or just going cronic for the addiction of having her around. I can't tell you whether to strive to work it out, or let it go.. that is up to you ( as again I don't know the story.. and no offence.. even if I ( or we ) did.. we're only gettin only one side of the story, and not hers ( again.. not saying I ( we ) don't trust you.. just stating the obvious ). Have you 2 seeked marriage concilling? I believe that in order for the divorce can be finalize, they would ask you to seek marriage conselling first. Swallow your pride bout seeing a shrink, and listen to what she has to say.. ( whether it upsets you or not.. or if its the truth or not.. since this is her PERSPECTIVE of things that lead to this and try to understand instead of defending ).

If it doesn't apply or work out .. sorry.. YOU WILL GET OVER IT... it'* a matter of time ( and the bitch part is between now and then ).. being young you shouldn't be worried as I too was around your age with my experience, and I stayed single for a great majority of the time afterwards ( and through time began to enjoy the single life and benefits :pimp: ). I dated a lot for short period of times till I met Mufifn ( Tamara ) and I have to now say that I've never been happier considering I've gotten along so well with Muffin and always smiling and laughin ( and she accepts me for my lil quirks and such, even though she may not approve of it ). After 3 years vs. the lil over half year ( 194 days 20 hours 6 minutes as I type this.. hee hee.. I keep track of weird things I know ), I think even though the break up was painful and I don't wish anyone to go through it.. it was the best thing that could've happened . You'll look back onto it one day later on and say.. wow I did that? ( kinda like remembering how you use to do really stupid things when you were younger that you thought was right for that time and mindstate? And now you'll never do it again? Its going to be one of those ).

But whichever way you go from this point on in your life ( whether to walk or stay ).. we'll be hear for you ( as long as you still have your bonnie jokes..

Holy crap I typed a lot but I feel your pain

I wish we had numbers because the stuff I have to say would be longer than what you said. Yes we thought about the counciling but I didn't want it in the beginning because I knew couples would be in disagreements in one point so I thought that was normal. I understand the other part about the love vs. addiction and that does make a lot of sence, either I am that much in love with her or just used to her being around. Damn this sucks.

Well.. the LD charge would kill the bill.. so you can catch me on msn, yahoo, or one of the awesome chat pages ( the kick *** one for bonnevilleclub? ) hee hee..

First things first hind sight is 20/20 (excuse the cliche), second if it comes down to it where you two are not going to get back together then immerse your anger and frustration into that would be productive (as mentioned before.......the bonneville) second when you are comfortable (and only then) and want to find a girl find a new scene to get involved in. You're 24! grab some friends and go to a bar or pub, anywhere new and have a good time and who knows what will happen, look at the thread about Toronto and Little Italy, I bet there were tons of good looking girls there. The best gf I ever had I met in a totally unexpected place. Whatever happens just remember that you have a whole family here with you.

I know. I try my best not thinking about my ex when I go out with the Bonneville Club here in Chicago. Last week I went out every night with them and all weekend long. I am really shy when it comes to meeting new females. By me knowing my ex for so long I still would feel comfortable talking to her before meeting someone else. But I will try harder to break the ice.

I would have to agree with that. I too was in a long term relationship for quite a while and after ew broke up I stayed single for what seemed like forever. But I used to go camping with friends every year about an hour or so from my house. One year ( 7 years ago august 1st) we seen a few people that one guy knew, we invited them back to the fire that night only to find out they lived about 5 mins from my house. Well 7 years later I am still with her. Not married yet but that is another story for another time.

So just when you think it won't get any better IT WILL. It is really tough getting over this kind of thing, Right Tamara, hehe. I told her the same thing many many times that it will take time and things will get better.

I too was shy when trying to meet people, it'* really hard for me not to be ( believe it or not).
First you have to get over her, then meet someone else, other wise you will be with someone and still talk about her and it'* not fair to either of you ( yourself and the new person).
I'm glad to see you are keeping yourself occupied as much as you are, I only wish I was able to do that when I broke up.

Hang in there, we are all here for ya!