> Two buddies, Bob and Larry, are getting very drunk
> at a bar when suddenly Larry throws up all over
> himself.
>
> "Oh, no... Now my wife will kill me!"
>
> Bob says, "Don't worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in
> your breast pocket and tell your wife that someone
> threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the
> dry cleaning bill."
>
> So they stay for another couple of hours and get
> even drunker.
>
> Eventually Larry stumbles home and his wife starts
> to give him a bad time. "You reek of alcohol and
> you've puked all over yourself! My God, you're
> disgusting!"
>
> Speaking very carefully so as not to slur his words,
> Larry says, "Nowainaminit, I can e'splain everythin.
> Itsh snot wha jew think. I only had a cupla drr
> rinks. But thiss other guy got ssick on me...he had
> one too many! and he juss koudin hold hizz liquor He
> said hes was verrry sorry an' gave me twennie bucks
> for ! the cle aning bill!"
>
> His wife looks in the breast pocket and says, "But
> this is forty bu cks.."
>
> "Oh, yeah... I almos' fergot, he shhhit in my pants,
> too."
>

oldie but goodie