ONE Recently, when I went to McDonald'* I saw on the menu that you
could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a
Half dozen nuggets.
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager At the counter. "You
don't?" I replied.
"We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply. "So I can't order a half
dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That'* right." So I shook my head and
ordered six McNuggets.


TWO I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items
and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I
Picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and
placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had
Scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all over
for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to
me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind,
I don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the
Things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.



THREE A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy
drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what
she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept
asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."


FOUR I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car.
"Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have
replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get
into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store)
would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm,
too?"
I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and
the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It'*
a long walk."


FIVE Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One
day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost
out of
typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the
secretary
told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece
of
paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank"
copies.



SIX I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home
was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need
of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I
Asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set
The "cruise control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.



SEVEN My neighbor works in the operations department in the central
office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they
Have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman
in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming
from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"



EIGHT Police in Radnor, Pa., interrogated a suspect by placing a
Metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy
machine. The message "He'* lying" was placed in the copier, and police
pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling
the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.



NINE A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she
needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating
ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and should be
fine, the mother says, I just gave him some ant killer..... Dispatcher: Rush
him in to emergency!


"Life is tough. It'* tougher if you're stupid."

didnt something like this happen to Jim Wallace at a meet?

very funny btw!

Ok. Time for a funny (kinda) story about how stupid I can be. First, I'll say I'm a smart girl-I truly am, but this time I really wasn't thinking. I'm in the school lot, and did the one thing that I was always afraid I'd do. I was getting books out of my trunk and had put my keys in the trunk and shut the lid without grabbing my keys. I realized quickly what I had just done. So after, I finished calling myself and my car all sorts of names, I checked my doors-they were unlocked! Good, right? So what do I do, I sit there contemplating how to get my keys out of my trunk through the backseat. ....Yeah, since, just pushing the trunk release wouldn't have been obvious...

End of the story...I finally, after some thought, actually did remember the trunk release and laughed at my own stupidity.

At least it wasn't a Police Car, like one of my guys I had to go rescue in Korea...

made me think of the mechanic unlocking the car here:
http://www.bonnevilleclub.com/forum/...ic.php?t=32694

Hehe, thats a good one. Wouldn't work in the Bonne though, it needs power to pop the trunk. The same thing happened to me with our Grand Am, but I never even thought of using the trunk release. I resorted to putting the backseats down and climbing into the trunk to find them...what was I thinking...

As the boss I get a lot of wifes calling for their husbands at work.
This one time I get a call and the female voice asks for Joe, I tell her that he is on the floor and I'll take a message. She says to call her cellphone cause she'* stuck at the post office?
I ask "whats the matter"?
"I cant key out of the ignition", "I need the mail".
I said "did you put the car in Park"?
I hear "Clunk, clunk, clunk".
She says "Oh good they come out now".
I said "Fine you can get the mail now, talk to you later"
She thanks me and hangs up.

A few minutes later she calls to say she locked the keys in the car

See if I did that with the Bonne I would have been [almost] SOL, since my trunk release didn't work.

Oh bummer. If mine didn't work I'd be SOL for sure. The wierd (or not?) thing about the GA is that the releases for the rear seats are in the trunk...therefore useless in such a case as mine. But as I'm contemplating how I plan to get my keys out of my trunk, for some odd reason, my mind switched back to the Bonne with the porthole and that'* what I was trying to deal with.