Cats are not quite like the Devil but close. I have one but cats can be rubbing on you and purring one moment then the next second the cat grabs onto you like your some kinda meat then knawls and scratches the hell out of you for no reason.
When my cat does that I just Gently place her in the bathtub turn on the water ever so slightly for a little while then keep her in the bathroom (I keep towels for her in the bathroom if she needs them) so she thinks about it.
People tell me it doesnt work because the cat doesn't remember what it did. My answer to that are you in the cats mind? After that the cat comes out all calm and lovable again then jumps on your lap and you repeat the process over and over again.
Dont worry I dont abuse my cat I just get it a little wet thats all, it needs a bath sometimes and I am not going to hold the cat while its getting cleaned.
By the way My cat is named Sasha, If its a girl I think Felony would be purrfect