Here'* some to ponder....
-How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
-OK, so what'* the speed of dark?
-I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
-Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
-Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
-If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
-Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
-When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
-What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
-I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
-I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
-Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
-The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
-The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
-The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
If you haven't guessed.....yep it'* Steven Wright
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo
cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of
the afternoon'* appointments. -- Steven Wright
What'* another word for Thesaurus? -- Steven Wright
The sign said "eight items or less". So I changed my name to Les.
-- Steven Wright