actual conversation b/w me and my better half
i headbutted nancy. (it hurt, dont ask why, it was an accident)
she headbutted me. (it hurt worse, but it wasnt an accident)
me: "my god, we're like a pair of retarded monkeys."
her: "retarded monkeys?"
her: im not a retarded monkey.
me: well fine. but i am.
me: i want to be a retarded monkey when i grow up.
her: i wont marry a retarded monkey
me: yes you will. if you recall, you already promised. you can be the wife of a retarded monkey.
me: im going to have fifty of them, you know.
[ one eyebrow went up at this point ]
her: fifty? you cant afford fifty. and polygamy is frowned on by society.
me: retarded monkeys.
me: im going to have fifty retarded monkeys.
[ pause ]
me: they eat bananas.
okay so im bored.