15 Things I Want To See Before I Die (PG)
1. Motley Crue covered by a polka band.
2. Bad-*** Baboon Liberation (I think they are tired of being persecuted).
3. A line of midgets entering a bar dancing and singing to The Safety Dance.
4. Whatever manner of horror is hiding under Donald Trump'* bad hair. I think I'm ready to see it.
5. A large chain of restaurants called J.E.H.F.F.* (Just Eat Here Fat *****).
6. Fight Club: The Musical.
7. A lifestyle magazine for the "plus sized" demographic called Hey Fat Bastard magazine.
8. A difficult to find nightclub called The G-Spot...mainly so I can hear dialogue like this:
Sam: What did you do this weekend?
Bob: I was supposed to meet some friends at The G-Spot.
Sam: Did you go?
Bob: I couldn't find it.
Sam: You couldn't find The G-Spot? I've never found it either.
Bob: I wish I had a map or something.
Sam: I do! And I still haven't found the damn thing!
Bob: I'm starting to think it doesn't exist.
9. Corey Feldman being kicked in the nads.
10. Whatever the opposite of Rambo 4 would be...because I definitely don't want to see Rambo 4.
11. Care Bears vs. Pissed Off Dragons: The movie.
12. Brad Pitt, George Clooney, and John Stamos hanging out in a bar...and not getting laid. Admittedly, this one is the least likely to happen before I die.
13. Jessica Alba nude.
14. The world world to suddenly stop caring about Paris Hilton.
15. A film with both Keanu Reeves and Joey Lawrence...so we can finally settle who does a better "Whoa".
1998 SE Midnight Blue Pearl
Gutted airbox, FRAM AirHog, removed MAF Screen, eBay clear corners, extended brake lights
I'm so much cooler online