F-150 vs. U-Haul
Croozin back from KC one night heading east on I-70, I'm minding my own buisness just chillin... chillin cuz the windows are down SHEESH the snow'* blowing in roll em back up!! ok I'm not chillin no more. Suddenly I spot my prey... a UHAUL! about my speed I can take this guy... I know I can. I drive a F-150 XLT V-8 302 with 200 horsies running around under that hood, with custom dent in front bumper applied by old lady who pulled out in front of me on a rainy morning *if it'd only been a little harder it mighta made a HOLE and like that would be like Ram Air right?* newayz I have a feeling this dent changes my areodynamics giving me another 40hp *A trip to the dynos this weekend will confirm*. Ne how I turn off OD *automatic btw* and pop it down in 2nd I close my eyes and pretend my Vetech/Vtech/Vtec is kicking in... wait is that my imagination or is it kicking in!! no it'* my rear end clanking gawsh darn it look at that white smoke, I quickly pull it up back on D.... ok forget that, no downshifting for me, but by this time I'm pulling hard on this guy as I'm running about 300kph *converts to about 80mph*. As I draw closer my heart leaps in my throat as I realise this guy has a lowered bumper for easier loading badge on the back door!! wow this race is gona be closer than I thought! I sneak up behind him riding his tail TOTALLY unnoticed... OH YAH I know what I'm doing I've had lots of expierience sneaking up in these bad boys blind spots. I check my mirrors all is clear, not grandmas and no cops, I rip the wheel over into the left passing lane... a little too hard perhaps and end up doing a sucession of fishtails, this must freak the guy in the Uhaul out as he looks in his mirror as fishtails let on that you have more power than you actually do, so newayz as I draw up even to the guy so we can do this race right my eyes grow bigger. You wanna talk about stickers them rice boys put on thier rides, now this dude had STICKERS, a huge butt lobster on the side for starters, an "Airconditioned, Automatic" sticker on the door and a custom "Grandma'* attic" up on the overhang. Enuf of this ricer dude he can't scare me with his stickers. I look over at him and he looks down at me like, "huh?". I held up three fingers for the countdown, and he held up his middle finger? what in the world? 1 finger already?? he puts it down and I guess that means GO so I bury the pedal and start to pull hard... 80mph...85mph....85.4432mph.... the race is over it'* like he didn't even react HAH I'm about 5 lengths ahead by now and I notice he turns on his hazards to signal my win... funny thing is only his right hand hazard works and he immediatly exits the interstate... huh? must be scared.